I Want More

I Want More

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I want more out of my life….Is that so wrong?

I’m 64 years old, have had numerous careers and adventures in just a tad bit more than 6 decades on this earth…..but I’m not done.

Listening to podcasts is my downfall. I get inspired by people who, like me, seek to live large, loud and my new “L” word is lovingly.

I’m so tired of all the disagreement, misreading and misunderstandings.

I don’t want to ignore a world that’s falling apart but I don’t also want to live under it’s rule.

Kathy read something to me in the car on the way home from the gym in Tillamook, Oregon.

“I think one of the hardest things, at least for me, is to allow someone to have a bad opinion of me. I want to defend myself. I want to explain why they’re wrong. I want to convince them that I’m a decent person and I am worth liking.

I don’t want my reputation left in their hands, because their hands are fickle.”

But, as the article goes on to say, what people think of us is really out of our hands.

So my question to me is “Why do I care?”

Someone told me once “Rick, it is none of your business what other people think of you.” That was an awakening.

I believe that for the first time in my life I’m not caring what the world labels me.

I’m on vacation which always gives me time to re-examine my life. Change doesn’t scare me. It used too but when God gives limited options, and it happens over and over again, you learn to swim against the current without drowning. Actually what you learn is when the waters get rough and you are flying downstream, don’t fight the current and avoid the snags.

So what does all this have to do with me wanting more? I need more depth. I need to go deeper with my podcasts, writing and just my damn life. I feel like i’m surface swimming with an occasional deep dive…but I’m not staying under the water long enough to make it risky.

A few years ago Kathy and I got hired to do a video on Deep Diving off the coast of California. We’d never done it before and it scared the hell out of us. We suited up, crawled in the ocean getting slammed by the current and then had to deep dive into the ocean.

We did better than we thought because we listened to the experts.

But it was hard, really hard and you just wanted to stop.

When we felt like giving up, we dove again and again until it felt right.

That’s what I want with my life.

Admittedly I’m afraid to ask God for this because it usually means challenges.

But to hit 65 and 66 and 67 and still be doing the same thing is just not enough.

If God is my Father and I know He is, doesn’t He want what I want for my boys? I want lives where they take chances, risk everything, and never settle for comfort.

I want them to feel alive and never be satisfied with doing what everyone else is doing.

And I want them to understand that everyone is not going to like them, accept them or include them…..and that’s great….who cares.

Yeh, I want More.

Here we go.