Not so fast mister.

Sep 30, 2009   //   by Rick Dancer   //   Blog  //  5 Comments

I had this feeling today had potential. You know how it works; you get up, get something from God that strikes you a little deeper than most days and just know. At the same moment I knew that I would have to fight to keep that attitude and I had a feeling something or someone was lurking nearby ready to try and take it away from me.

Without giving too many details, because some of you were there, it happened just as I suspected. I had a great meeting, made some phone calls; even saw my former owner at KEZI Scott Chambers. We had a good talk and the day is only half over. But out the blue, when I wasn’t expecting it I got a phone call that brought up an accusation that goes way back. The person on the other end of the phone was not the culprit. He had no idea he was feeding a fire with gas but he was and for a moment I shut down. It was one of those nagging little things that stirred memories of the campaign, thoughts from my childhood and all sorts of crap.

I used to toy, toil and torment myself by going over what was said in my head. The thought was if I could manipulate the information or come up with a reason or an excuse, I could explain why someone was being so rude.

I don’t do that anymore. For a minute I cared about what was said because it struck the nerve. But I’m learning to deaden the nerve and fight off the temptation to worry or rearrange information to make myself feel better. Maybe I’m really starting to understand that I will never be understood and that there is a force (Satan) that is trying to rob me of my joy.

The day is only half over. I have two more meetings and some work to do. I’m sure that voice, that phone call, or a surprise moment will try again to blur my focus. I can only pray that God will continue showing me that I only have to please one….and He’s easy.

5 Comments

  • ChuckWoolsey September 30, 2009 at 4:09 pm

    Sounds like the grape crushers are squeezing you right where it hurts. Just think you will be wine before you know it.

  • kate September 30, 2009 at 4:16 pm

    thanks for posting this rick :)

  • zach October 5, 2009 at 4:40 pm

    It sound like you are ready for a nice drive in your underwear again Rick.

  • zach October 5, 2009 at 6:40 pm

    It sound like you are ready for a nice drive in your underwear again Rick.

  • zach October 5, 2009 at 11:40 pm

    It sound like you are ready for a nice drive in your underwear again Rick.

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