Mr. Cancer……. It’s not working.

I hated you when I first met you. I thought you were the embodiment of evil and would have ripped you out of my life if the ability were given to me. I feared your name for most of my life, seeing you as the worst thing that could happen to me. There was a time when just the thought of you would dampen my spirit, sending me into a tailspin of despair and desperation…but not anymore.

You don’t scare me because you don’t own me. You don’t scare me because you are not in charge. You can hamper communication within my body so the cells go crazy but at some point you will be stopped.

The funny thing, that you do not understand is that, while you wish to rob me of my life you have actually assisted in giving me a new one. While you try to point me to the grave I find myself rising to new places. Your mission is to cover my eyes and destroy my vision but let me tell you Mr. Cancer my vision has never been clearer.

You want me to think of you as the enemy but actually you have become a means to an end. You want me to over-react and run from you but instead I will ignore you and fight the real enemy who actually controls you not me.

You are trying to destroy my relationships but what you don’t see is the strength and bond, just your name creates among people. I refuse to look at you as the enemy but instead as a stone in my path that I almost tripped over but instead was shown the way around.

Am I still fearful? Yes. Do I think this battle can get rougher? Most certainly. Do I have moments in the day when I want to cry, hide, wake-up from this nightmare, scream, run for my life or forget that I have Cancer? YES-YES-YES.

But I do not want to go back and be the Rick Dancer I was one month ago today. I don’t want to lose all that I have gained from this disease. So, I’ll grab the hand of my wife and the word of my God and take another step.

Mr. Cancer……it’s not working.

5 Comments

• 
  Jill Hornback Evans March 2, 2010 at 6:38 am

  Beautifully written Rick, and very inspiring. Thank you
• 
  Terra March 2, 2010 at 8:14 am

  Praise God Rick. Your strength is beautiful and inspiring.
• 
  John @ TheChristianDollar.com March 2, 2010 at 9:43 am

  Powerful post. Your determination is inspiring!
• 
  Terra March 2, 2010 at 10:14 am

  Praise God Rick. Your strength is beautiful and inspiring.
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  John @ TheChristianDollar.com March 2, 2010 at 11:43 am

  Powerful post. Your determination is inspiring!