Spend anytime on social media and quickly see how people use “judgment” to try to shut others down.
Donald Miller puts it this way in his new book: “Scary Close.”
“Is there anything more toxic than the fear of being judged? Judgment shuts us down and makes us hide. It keeps us from being ourselves, which keeps us from connecting with other people. There are judges behind every bush. “
I don’t like to be judged. In fact it pisses me off. Sometimes I write a blog or post a picture and a few minutes later this little voice says: “I wonder how people will take that?” In my out loud voice I remember myself how little I really care.
One time I was bidding on a job in a town nearby and one of the issues that came up for them was that I am so open with my conversations they weren’t sure how some people might take that. I try to separate my business pages from what I do in my personal life but they do bleed together. I can’t/won’t change who I am. I ended up not getting the job and for an instant questioned myself but quickly decided I would not go back and live as I did at KEZI or as a political candidate.
Don’t you get tire of acting? Does it bug the heck out of you when you hear people second and third guessing how someone might take a certain word or sentence? I can’t tell you how frustrating that is for me. Yet, I understand the need to be careful. There are trolls out there just waiting to hammer you over the head with a gavel when you say something that doesn’t line up with them. We have people who don’t want conversation, opinion or those who aren’t on their side, to have a say in anything. So, they pretend to be open but specialize in slamming doors in your face.
I learned a long time ago not to be afraid. I figured out if you stick your foot in the door before the “judge” has time to slam it, the door will not close.
Now, you may end up with an injured foot but a bruise won’t kill you.
What will kill you is covering up your soul. If you hide in fear over the judges, they win.
Donald Miller writes: “I don’t believe we are accidents in the world, and I don’t believe we were supposed to be actors either.”
Are you an actor? Are you pretending, hiding and ducking for fear of ending up on the hot seat? Sometimes ducking is a good idea but I wouldn’t make a lifestyle out of it. If you do, the judges win.
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